The anger from the last few days has exhausted me, emotionally and mentally.  I’m sleeping, but not as much as I would like (like 15+ hrs).  The house is still a mess and I’m feeling like a slag for not getting it done.  Not to prove to my mom that I can but to prove to myself that I can.  I just want to curl up in a ball and hide from the world again.  I see nothing but manipulation spewing from my mother’s mouth.  I hate the anger and yet at the same time it’s safe, I’m safe when I have those barbed walls around me.  I wish I could just cuddle Sammy close to me and wait for the end of days, but parrots aren’t exactly the cuddling type, come to think of it, neither is anger.

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