When I’m not doing well, and especially when I was taking care of my mom, my morning prayers were a simple: Please get me through. I never elaborated to Him or to myself what ‘through’ meant. I just wanted to survive another day. I’ve always wanted to just get through. Sure, I have grand ideas, and I want more but I live small, mostly in fear that everything is going to disappear and I’ll have to start all over again. This leads to hanging on to bad thing to long, not risking anything for fear the good thing ahead of me is a lie (because everything is a lie, after all) and I stagnate dreaming of being better.
I wrote out my New Year’s Resolutions yesterday and they were the normal fare I set out for myself each year. A basic “do better” laundry list. My theme, as stated in my last post is to “Move Forward”, but move forward to where? Like a road trip, goals need a destination.
This is my destination….of course now, I need to rework my NYRs to help me THRIVE instead of just survive.
Blogging From The Void 